Eight-legged Computer Freaks

"Yo! What's up, yah all? And you're listenen' to 92.8," the radio blared. Abruptly, the radio altered stations and gave a very peculiar news flash. "We're sorry to (crrrrraaaaaakkkkl) interrupt this this program, but (cccrrrraaaakkkllll ccccrrrraaakkkkl) there have been multiple sightings of (cccrrrraaaakkkllll) creatures. We are not quite sure of the accuracy of these reports but we believe these so-called creatures are interrupting our transmission."

Zach's radio then returned to 92.8. "That's odd," he thought.

Suddenly, an odd, cracking voice came from downstairs. "What are you listening to, boy? I don't want you listening to that funky rap stuff!" yelled Zach's father.

"That's strange," thought Zach. "Dad doesn't usually sound like that. I wonder what could be wrong. Hmmm, I'd better go check on him."

Rather quietly, Zach sneaked down to the living room, where his father lay wide-eyed and pale in front of "Who Wants to be a Millionaire?" on the wide-screen TV. The phone rang. Zach's father didn't budge. He just lay there, his eyes glued to the TV.

The answering machine beeped. "Hello. This is the Thornton residence. We can't come to the phone right now, but if you leave your name and number, we'll get back to you."

"Greetings. This is Dan Brown from the 24/7 news channel. We are returning your call. We are sorry that your message broke up before you told us what was happening. You know the number, so call us back with the details."

Zach didn't make it to the phone in time to pick up the call, but he dialed star-69, which calls the last number that called you. "Mr. Brown?" he asked. "This is Zach Thornton. My father must have called you earlier, but there's something seriously wrong with him now. What did he tell you?"

"He said there's had been 'a slight incident' in the household," the newscaster said. "Something about an intruder. His message then broke up, with a sharp crackle."

CCCCCCCRRRRRRRAAAAAACCCCCCKKKKKKLLLLLL.

The phone went dead. Zach turned around to see a quick flash of light and what looked like a pale-green arachnid the size of a refrigerator. Just as quickly, it was gone, then it was back again. Zach got the impression it was phasing between two different worlds.

When again the creature materialized, it began rooting through the living room, as if it were looking for something. Not sure if the creature was an illusion or if it was real, Zach reached toward it and touched one of the eight hairy legs. Turning around, standing on only four of its legs, it wrapped Zach in a sticky web, all the while continuing to search the living room. Finally, its insect-like eyes fell upon Zach's father.

In deadly silence, the creature closely inspected the unmoving body, immobilized by a needle inserted into a pressure point in his neck.

Then, ignoring the squirming Zach, the creature turned its attention to the Thornton's 32-inch flat-screen TV. On a mission to collect cathode ray tubes so his mechanical race could continue to project life itself, the creature had set its sights on one of the biggest and brightest. It began uprooting wires and circuits until its feelers plucked the picture tube from the TV console. The creature then opened a compartment in its chest and set the cathode ray tube inside.

Zach continued to fight against his bonds, eventually breaking free. He reached for the creature, trying to stop it from phasing back to its own world. But he was too late. The creature phased in and out once, then was gone.

Zach rushed to the aid of his father, who still hadn't moved or spoken. Zach noticed the needle protruding from the side of his father's neck and, overcoming his initial fear, pulled it out.

Zach's father slowly regained consciousness. "What happened to the TV?" he asked.

"Forget about the TV!" Zach screamed. "We've got a race of giant mechanical spiders on the loose."

"I remember seeing a flash of light and hearing a loud crackle, but that's about it," Zach's father said. "Then my mind went blank."

"Well, we've got to do something," Zach said, "like maybe directing them to the nearest Circuit City."

"What would that accomplish?" his father asked. "It wouldn't get back our TV."

"Let's go turn on the other TV," Zach said. "If this is happening anywhere else, maybe there will be a news flash."

They went upstairs to Zach's bedroom and turned on his 20-inch flat screen. They flipped through all the channels, finding only the typical TV stuff.

The ringing phone startled them. Zach grabbed the receiver and said, "Hello."

"Greetings, this is Dan Brown from the 24/7 news channel. We got cut off before and I was wondering what was happening."

"A lot," Zach responded. "A giant mechanical spider materialized in our house, knocked my father unconscious, wrapped me up in a sticky web and stole the picture tube from our TV."

"WOW, that sounds like news to me," the newsman said.

CCCCCCCRRRRRRRAAAAAACCCCCCKKKKKKLLLLLL.

The phone went dead. The creature was back. Ignoring Zach and his father, the creature attacked Zach's TV.

"HEY," Zach's father yelled. "Hey, you. We're watching that. What are you doing to the TV?"

The creature faced Zach and his father and began emitting sharp, shrieking noises.

"That sounds vaguely familiar," Zach's father said. "I know, it's binary code."

"You're the computer guy, so you'd know," Zach said. "So what's he saying?"

"1-0-0-1-1-1-0-0-1-0-1-0-0-1-1-1-1-0-0-1-0-1-0."

"What's it mean?" Zach asked.

"It takes a while," Zach's father said. "Let me listen a bit more"

"1-0-0-1-1-1-0-0-1-0-1-0-0-1-1-1-1-0-0-1-0-1-0."

"Sounds like the creature needs the picture tubes because all the display screens in its world have been cursed," Zach's father said.

The creature stopped beeping and reached again for the TV.

"1-0-1-1-0-0-0-1-0-1-1-1-1-0-1-0-1?"said Zach's father.

"1-1-0-0-0-1-1-0-1-1-1-1-0-1-0," answered the creature.

"Zack, I'll be home in time for dinner. In the meantime, I'll be returning to this creature's home world to see what I can do about these so-called cursed computer screens."

"B-b-b-but."

"No buts, Zach. I'm going," replied Zach's father.

Without warning, Zach's father and the creature returned to the creature's home world.

Roughly 20 seconds later, the creature and Zach's father had materialized in what looked like a large, circular chamber make of what looked like marble and granite.

"1-1-0-1-1-1-1-1-0-0-1-1-0-0-0-1," said Zach's father, which in English would sound like, "Take me to your leader."

"1-0-0-1-1-1-0-0-1-0-1-0-0-0-1," retorted the creature, meaning "very well, then."

The creature led Zach's father down a long, narrow corridor, just barely higher than 68 inches. When they emerged from the corridor, they stood in front of an immense arachnid about the size of a small bedroom. Above it, light poured in from the large sun dome above.

"1-0-0-1-1-0-0-1-0-1-0-1-1-1-0-0-1-0-1," Zach's father said. In English, that would mean, "I've come to fix your computer screens."

"0-0-0-1-1-0-1-1-1-1-0-1-0-1-0-1-0-1-0-1," said the immense arachnid, meaning, "Very well, then. We appreciate your help."

"1-1-0-1-0-1-0-0-1-0-0-1-0-1-1-0-1-0-1-0-1-1-0-0-1-0-1-0-1-1-0-1-0-1," pronounced Zach's father. This would sound like, in English, "But first, we need to make a deal. I'll fix the computer screens and you stop bothering Earth."

"0-1-1-0-1-0-1-0," returned the immense arachnid, meaning "agreed." "1-1-0-1-0-1-0-1-0-1-0-1," in English, "the main control is over there."

Zach's father slowly walked over to the control pad. As he reached out, a small keyboard popped out. It was in English. The screen was already on and it was filled with the number 7. The number 7 ran across all the screens like wallpaper. Zach's father guessed it was some sort of virus. Fingers barely fitting on the buttons, he hit alt-control-delete and the normal workstations popped back up.

"1-0-1-0-1-0-0-0-1-0-1-0-1-1-0-1-0-1," exclaimed the immense arachnid. In English, "Thank you, human. We will now send you on your way."

Zach's father began phasing in and out of the great hall and back into his own living room where Zach was sitting watching cartoons. He was astonished to see his father back so soon. Zach jumped up, flung his arms around his father and yelled, "You're back. Thank God!

"So what was it, father? What was wrong with them?" asked Zach.

"Well, son, it turns out that they only had a minor computer virus. They really are simple-minded creatures. And I hope to meet up with them again in the future when they have further evolved."

The End